Pardon my French fry review

Bri Pedicone and Sara Parliman

Two self-proclaimed fry connoisseur’s give their semi-professional opinion on Puyallup’s large variety of French fries. Based on a very particular scale, these restaurants were rated on their price, taste of fries, service and the atmosphere. Roughly $20 and an extra three pounds later, we bestow our knowledge unto you, our readers.

 

Red Robin: $2.07 (one basket + one refill)

Red Robin’s fries are what other fries strive to be. Not only are they light and fluffy but also hearty and filling. When they first come, the basket appears to be lacking in the amount of fries you actually receive. After your first basket, you are already full but for some reason you choose to get the free refill anyway. You can’t just simply stop eating these magnificent fries. They’re crispy, golden and salty, with the perfect amount of their special seasoning. We compare thee to a summer’s day and by thee, we mean Red Robin’s delicious fries. The service was up to par. What is our par you ask? Well our waitress was willing to sneak us a free second refill. That is our par. Sadly, we were so full, we had to decline. The atmosphere was quiet around midday but since it’s such a popular joint, we are fully aware that it can become very noisy. We felt very secluded in our private booth thanks to the soft lighting, though the people in booth next to us were but three feet away. We wouldn’t be surprised if they could hear us ranting and raving over how good the fries were in exaggerated British accents.

 

Price: 5 stars

Atmosphere:  3.5 stars

Fries: 5 stars

Service: 4 stars

TOTAL: 4.375 stars

 

Central Perk: $2.71 (one full basket)

This hometown café is very comforting and the employees just make you smile. It’s an open concept café, plenty of room for activities with the calming white noise of classical music playing in the background. The fries take quite some time to be cooked upon ordering, however they are nice and hot when your tot is brought. The fries are crisp and flavorsome, seemingly seasoned by the ashes of a phoenix with a hint of sunshine (though it might just be salt.) The basket is overflowing with decent sized fries; it once fed us and three of our friends. The price is more than reasonable for how many fries you get. Not to mention, it’s convenient location in the heart of downtown Puyallup.

 

Price: 5 stars

Atmosphere: 4 stars

Fries: 3.5 stars

Service: 3 stars

TOTAL: 3.875 stars

 

Anthem: $6.56 (one full basket)

Anthem has become the number one hang out for people of all ages for a good reason. The atmosphere is aesthetically pleasing, with a very modern feel, decorated in rustic furnishings with lighting comparable to a lone night under a full moon. Just like Anthem itself, the fries are small and quirky. These fries were definitely the most unique of all that we tried. Being thin and short, you’d think that they would be lacking in bulk or flavor but we were pleasantly surprised by how flavorful and satisfying they were. It was as if an anthem of angels sang when we tried our first bite. Nevertheless, it wasn’t quite as filling as we had hoped and the price made it implausible for us attain seconds. However the fries were prepared in a timely manner and the staff was kind enough to give us free tea when a customer failed to come forth and claim it as their own.

 

Price: 1 star

Atmosphere: 4.5 stars

Fries: 4 stars

Service: 4.5 stars

TOTAL: 3.5 stars

 

 

Don’s Drive-In: $2 (small paper bowl full)

Service as fast as a speeding bullet and fries as crispy and golden as Aslan’s mane. Unfortunately, we were not in Narnia and we did not find these fries in the back of wardrobe but rather at the counter of Don’s Drive-In. If they had been from Narnia, they might have been more magical. They were mediocre but still enjoyable. They were a step above fast food fries. The drive in itself is crowded and enclosed making Bri’s claustrophobia emerge. As she runs away crying into the parking lot, Sara couldn’t possibly leave the fries behind. Of course this didn’t actually happen but it might as well have. The fries, in all their glory, were finished quickly, leaving us still a bit famished. However, comparatively we would not return to this destination on our quest for a good fry. Unless of course, it magically becomes Narnia but we’ll save that journey for a different day.

 

Price: 5 stars

Atmosphere: 2 stars

Fries: 3 stars

Service: 4 stars

TOTAL: 3.5 stars

 

Five Guys: $2.99 (A regular cup of fries + a “topper”)

Five Guys is notorious for its busy environment, both behind the counter and in the seating area. It seems as though neither the cooks nor the customers get a break. The service is very distant; you order, you pick up your order, you eat your order and leave your order to be cleaned up by the person you ordered it from whilst crunching on peanuts, via your feet. The fries are thick and greasy, yet still enjoyable and come in bulk. This could easily feed a very large group. You may not end up finishing your fries and we suggest you feed them to seagulls, (we wish you good luck in finding seagulls.) It has the best value for the amount you receive and if you’re in a hurry and hungry, this is the place to go. But if you want somewhere more relaxing with better quality fries, this isn’t your joint.

 

Price: 5 stars

Atmosphere: 1 star

Fries: 3 stars

Service: 3 stars

TOTAL: 3 stars

 

 

Crockett’s: $5.06 (bowl of fries)

The description on the menu was more mouthwatering than the actual dish itself. Lacking in any flavor, we could have been eating air and it would have tasted the same. This puzzled us, however, because the smell of garlic and spice was so overwhelming. Despite the lack of customers in the diner, we were basically left unattended throughout our dining experience. They literally forgot about us once or twice. But the ambiance is quaint, unique and family-friendly. Regardless of the flavor—or lack thereof—we felt obligated to finish the fries due to its outrageous price. We do not recommend this restaurant, save yourself the money and time.

 

Price: 1 star

Atmosphere: 2 stars

Fries: 2 stars

Service: 2 stars

TOTAL: 1.75 stars